Brighton pub’s first in the country to introduce CCTV cameras in loos

Did you know that it’s illegal to write graffiti in public toilets? Well, neither does 99.9% of the rest of the nation, according to a recent government survey, which is why, when you go into virtually every pub and club in the country, you’ll find a dazzling array of bad penmanship, half-baked philosophies, poetry and rants n raves scrawled illegibly on virtually every available surface provided in public toilets. To see a good example of just how wide-spread this menace is, check out the women’s toilet at The Albert on Trafalgar Street, which is also included in the survey (see above quote). In the government survey, Brighton came out the 3rd highest for rates of incidents of toilet graffiti in public toilets.

The survey, conducted in 20 cities across the UK, was funded through a £1.3 million government grant in a national campaign to stamp out all forms of social deviancy including graffiti, public displays of affection, late night urinating on streets, public drinking, spitting gum on sidewalks, and chavs. The grant will provide the necessary income for the pilot scheme, which will see the installing of CCTV cameras in public toilets in 3 drinking establishments across Brighton & Hove, and if successful, the scheme will give smaller grants to help subsidise costs to other pubs and clubs in other cities.

“I think it’s shameful,” said one Brighton & Hove City Council executive when shown the report’s findings. The city’s Council, known for it’s zero tolerance on street graffiti, has been waging a war against it’s taggers and graffiti artists for the past three years. We posed the question: which is worse, tagging on the side of a newsagent or scribbling in a public toilet? “Well, obviously both are huge crimes against the State. Total disregard for authority and lack of respect for his or herself. If we had to pick one, I’d say we’ve done our bit to get those little hoodie wearing shits for quite some time and I think we’ve put the fear of God into them by now. They stay out of Churchill Square and in the gutter, where they belong. I say, let’s tackle the masses in the toilets. Leave their sick humour to their own toilets at home. Good riddance to bad rubbish.” After this interview, that Council executive got a pay rise of £50,000 and was promoted within the Council. Good work.

Once home to the creatively-stifled and possibly the sexually-repressed, toilets will be given a complete make-over thanks to the new CCTV cameras, which are being fitted over the next month and will be unveiled at a public launch on 1st December 2006. “Think of it as an early Christmas present,” concluded the Council executive. Will toilet users will be forced to clean up their act? We’ll see.

Statistics are false and you’d be a fool to believe them… then again are we too far off?

Amy the Film Maker